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| Friggin love lasers at clubs. |
I'm the one who goes out with a
few other girls and hangs with them for most of the night. Maybe I'll dress up
slutty, maybe I won't give a crap and I'll stick with my jeans - I'm just out for a good time, so who cares?
Normally I'll be pretty honest
with men - they have a lot to compete with. Not each other... I just have a
really comfy mattress waiting for me at home. As much as I like free drinks and
I like to joke about getting lots... I lied. I rarely accept free drinks. Free
anything, really. I can't be the kind of person to take something and not
return it in kind. Unless I'm pretty desperate, I won't accept things. Heck,
I'm not even a fan of getting excessive presents. It makes me feel like I owe
the person - and it also makes me feel like shit if I'm not as excited about
the present as they are. Hence why I almost don't like being there to see a
person open a present I gave them. I don't want them to feel obligated to be
enthusiastic about how much they like the gift. I'm well aware that sometimes
presents are just 'cool' and not 'super awesome amazing' things. Although I really
like randomly buying things for people because I know they'll think they're
super and awesome and amazing.
Moving on from that little
rant... basically I'm just saying that I'll try to be nice when I'm turning a
guy down. I won't be a bitch and take free things from them. I'm also hoping
that by being this nice it means that they won't get upset. Sadly, this
approach doesn't always work.
Sometimes they get mad. Sometimes
you turn down a dance and they 'accidentally' bump into you in an inappropriate
way. One smooth guy pushed past me and apologised by shaking my hand and not
letting go. Then kissing me on the cheek. Twice. And only cheek because I laughed
and turned to the side. Honestly I'll take that over some creepy ass grabbing
any day. At least he made it funny. Surprise ass-grabbing is never funny. It
leads to surprise face-punching.
Also a lie. I'm really not that
violent. I can safely say I'll stick up for myself if necessary, but I'd really
rather use my words. For example, I was dancing when some stranger
unceremoniously put his hand up my skirt. Really, dude? Really? Oh, I was so
flattered I jumped into his arms and went home with him. No. Blech. As
satisfying as it would've been to give him a black eye, a rare moment once
taught me that it really hurts your hand. So I very politely said "If you
don't walk away right now I'll grab you in the same place and I promise not to
be gentle." I think it's the calm composure that gets them in the end.
I think my best defence is that I
can give off a pretty threatening vibe when needed. It's one of the few times
when not being a small girl comes in handy. Unfortunately I have the poker face
of a toddler. So instead of sticking around to laugh at this guy's confused expression,
I bailed and found some nice guys who'd stick up for me if that winner came
around again. My sharp tongue is enough of a challenge to most men, so not many
put in an effort to get past it. Hence my line when I'm trying to turn down
nice guys saying "sorry, I'm not your type." If you can't survive the
banter, get out of the bedroom.
In the end, it's always a fun
night and I get to go home with the best people. Friends! They don't keep you
warm at night, but it's never awkward in the morning.
